The High Road

I think one of the biggest signs that I’m growing up is how I deal with arguments. Up until last year I had a serious anger problem and in any kind of fight, big or small I’d just fucking lose it and say things I shouldn’t whether I meant them or not. This would obviously lead to a lot of hurt feelings and really only made the situation worse. I’d always get into scraps with other fellas on a night out or whatever over nothing and there would be very few nights where something didn’t happen. Its not a great way to live, having that much anger inside you. It built up over a number of years and got really bad last year but now this year its all changed 🙂

Obviously I still get angry, I mean people are always gonna piss me off but I don’t lose it as easily as last year. I’ve figured out that losing it and saying all the shit you feel does absolutely fuck all and you might be angry as fuck which means you’ve a lot of not “nice” things to say, but really wheres that gonna get ya? The other person is just gonna be furious and might retaliate with a worse comeback and make you angrier and angrier and its just a downward spiral until someone says something or does something unforgivable out of anger. Who wins in that situation? No one. Its really hard to hold back in that situation I know.. but if its not a verbal fight then write out what you would LOVE to say to them down to the last word and then fucking delete that shit because its not going to change anything its only gonna make matters worse. The best solution is to take the high road. Simply reply with “okay” or “I understand” or whatever works for the situation and fucking leave it. Who in their right mind likes fighting anyway? Its the biggest waste of time in my opinion and its time you should be spending making the right person happy, yourself.

If you are constantly arguing with someone you will understand how draining and fucking annoying it is like fucking change the record no hahaha?

Nobody needs that in their life so just don’t rise to the occasion, if they keep aggravating you just walk away and leave them to be angry, and I of all people know how hard that is to do because everyone knows I never shut up or let things go but part of growing up is learning to do that. You might hate the person and you probably want to to hurt them, so you think that telling them that you hate them etc or knowing they are sad is gonna make you feel somewhat better, yeah it will for a few minutes, but then no.

If you’re anything like me you will regret what you said immediately. I don’t have it in me to be heartless and a lot of people would probably call me a cunt and yeah I can say mean things but when I do that I feel really bad and I think about it for ages and not once in my life have I ever felt yeah I’m so glad I said that I’m glad I made them cry and hurt them as much as they hurt me, I’ve never thought that.. I’ve just felt guilty for sinking to their level. If they think its okay to insult you, put you down and make you feel as low as possible then don’t even fucking reply, just know that you will always be better than them, be the better person. Its a better way of dealing with things, the minute you feel like losing it and going off on a mad one just stop for a second and realise that its not fucking worth it, leave that person where they belong and move on to someone that isn’t going to make you feel that fucking shit 🙂 We all only have one life and do you really want to be on your deathbed saying aw man I loved those days I wasted fighting with you? Nah not really you should only have happy memorys at the end of your life and the bad ones should be long forgotten like the people that gave you them.

That’s my goal anyway, if you’re not a piece of shit yourself (which you probably aren’t) then don’t let someone talk to you like you are. Someone that thinks its okay to talk to another person like that says a lot about them not you. Someone out there will realise the good in you and would never dream of treating you that way so don’t waste your time on the person who is blind to that.

A year ago I thought the greatest satisfaction was punching someone in their wanker face when their acting a dick and yeah its pretty great but a year ago I went looking for it aswell but since I’ve been minding my own business there’s been a lot less fights so I know now I was part of the problem and that’s okay because I can admit that and I’ve learnt from it 🙂

No ones perfect and its good to get your emotions, especially anger, out but I really don’t think losing it at another person is the best way. It happens sometimes, because it is really hard to control if you’re like me but there’s a few other ways to get your anger out without making things worse and it helps you calm down and smile again 🙂

1. Write down what you want to say to them, what you want to call them how much they’ve hurt you or how much you hate them etc whatever you want to say to them write it all down and then rip it up, delete it, burn it whatever the fuck because at least its out there and its not in your heart anymore.

2. Chill with your mates and don’t talk about that person, talk about anything else, funny shit, just have a laugh and you will soon see that being angry is pointless.

3. Listen to some angry music that explains how you feel. I always listen to Eminem haha that chap just gets me. The songs I listen to are

  • crazy in love
  • stronger than I was
  • puke
  • love the way you lie
  • space bound
  • no love
  • beautiful pain 
  • superman                                                                                                                                                                      

Listen to those a couple of times and that makes me feel 100 times better and you too haha and while your listening you can just relax and calm down and let Eminem say the things u want to say instead 🙂

4. If its a fight through texts then delete all the messages, every single one because even if you calm down you’re gonna go back and see those horrible messages and get angry all over again, block them so they cant send anymore and just turn off your phone and leave it for a couple of hours and watch a movie or go for a walk or sleep or whatever some shit, just don’t go drinking because believe me, that will make it worse and will probably lead to horrible drunken messages that you cant take back.

5. Or…fucking write a blog about it hahaha, actually kind of does help to be honest and I don’t really care if anyone reads it or not its kind of just for me so that I can go back and read it and remind myself of a few things that I might forget 🙂 If I read this blog a year ago I’d be like what a pussy never back down in a fight hahaha but I was a fucking idiot back then and it got me nowhere. I’m 21 nearly 22 I don’t need bullshit fights keeping me down while I’m still young so I’m doing my best to let them all go, and hopefully my new way of dealing with arguments allows me to do that and I hope I’m happier because of it!

Anyways Good Luck , Happy Holidaysss hahahaha

Things/People You Don’t Need

Something I discovered this week is you don’t need things as much as you think you need them, same goes for people.

You might think that the only way you’re going to be happy is if you’re out there making loads of money and you never have to worry.. But the thing is once you have enough money bigger worries take over and some of the happiest people in the world have very little money. Yeah obviously it would be amazing to not worry about money but because most people are in the same boat you can kinda shift your thoughts and think that there’s more to life than money and you don’t need it to be happy, some of the richest people out there could never cure their depression. Money means nothing if you have nobody left to share it with.. Family and friends are more important than money will ever be. Your health is your wealth and nobody should ever forget that!

You might think you need a certain someone to keep going on but that’s not true. You don’t need anyone but yourself and the people that make you happy, nobody else. You can love someone who makes you very unhappy but then eventually you have to decide that if there is more pain than happiness then something has to change. Your heart doesn’t deserve to always be torn apart when it could actually be put back together by someone who does really want to make you happy. You’re never going to know unless you leave that pain where it belongs because you don’t need it, nobody does. Once you figure out that you don’t need that in your life then it’s easier to move on. If you do love someone who makes you happy but they don’t love you then they’re not making you very happy are they? Don’t wait for them to maybe fall in love with you move on and find someone who really does love you. You create your own happiness and if someone seems to enjoy taking that away from you then you leave, no matter how hard it is.

You do not need hate in your heart. You’re allowed to be angry at someone or something, furious even but you need to distance yourself from that situation and let go of the hate because all it does is hold you down like an anchor. Once u let go of that hate you will feel a weight lifted and it makes room for love which is the only thing that should be in your heart in fairness. It’s easy to hate someone, they can fuck you over, treat you horribly and make you feel so little but there is literally no point in holding onto those bad feelings, let them go and let those people go, that’s the hardest part but once you do it you will notice a big difference, no matter how much you hate something or someone just let it go, it’s over, move on and learn from it as much as you can, that is one thing you DO need to do.

You don’t need drugs to have a good time and I hate Dublin today where all the young ones and fellas are doing drugs and thinking nothing of it or even worse thinking there deadly because of it. It’s very hard to come across a decent girl nowadays who isn’t into doing drugs like coke etc I’ve used drugs in the past and one thing I do know is that they don’t help the situation your trying to avoid and you shouldn’t need them. I’ve no problem with weed it doesn’t agree with some people but I wouldn’t have a problem with it but I know you shouldn’t need weed for anything, to have a good time, to sleep etc and I’m working on giving it up. I just think this idea of all these young people thinking they need hard drugs to have a good night is just fucked up and shouldn’t be happening and I might sound like a gimp to some people but honestly ask me if I care?

You don’t need people that come in and out of your life like a fucking Yo-Yo, there is no point in that so just wipe them out. They usually come back into your life when THEY need something and all you have to do is tell them to kindly f**k off 🙂 don’t let people mess you about and act like your best pal and then never hear from them again those kind of people are leeches and not worth any of your time.

For me anyway I think I only need a couple of things to be happy with my life and that’s a healthy happy family , good friends , music , and southern fried chicken 🙂 anything else is just a fucking bonus as far as I can see, I’ve wiped out the dark clouds in my life and sure it’s looking like beautiful day 🙂 glaaaack